‘Dreamer, you’re nothing but an (inappropriate) dreamer’

This is a slightly awkward and embarrassing topic, as if nothing I’ve written on in the past is embarrassing. But, like everything else, I got to believe I’m not the only one.

Have you ever had a sexual dream of some random person you know? I do and have since I was in like middle school and it’s always someone to whom I’m not attracted and it’s always completely inappropriate. Like my homeroom teacher. What the hell? It’s not like it’s explicit, just enough to make me feel ashamed of dreaming something so twisted and make me completely uncomfortable every time I see the person. My head keeps playing it in reruns and I’m afraid they’re going to somehow figure it out. And then I got all freaked out that I’m secretly attracted to 50-some-year-old, overweight men. I used to really obsess over this in school. I just knew if anyone ever found out that would it be for me. Not that I needed any help in the uncool department.

What if dreams really are your subconscious acting out your hidden desires? What on earth does this say about me? Reason #145 of why I don’t seek professional help. I’m better off not knowing.